Scorpius Malfoy's Personal Hate List
by Harrypotterlover56
Summary: Scorpius Malfoy hates alot of things. He decide to write a list for you all to read. Sequel to Rose Weasley's Personal Hate List.
1. Clingy Girl Stalkers

**This is the sequel to Rose Weasley's Personal Hate List. I do not own anything.

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Clingy Girl Stalkers.

_Yes you heard me right I hate clingy girl stalkers. So there is this girl in my year, her name is Betty Parkinson. She thinks we are soul mates. I think it might have something to do with her mom having a thing for my dad. Anyway she follows me around everywhere, but that isn't the worse of it she knows things about me that I do not even know. Here I shall write down a conversation._

"_Hi Scorpy," Betty said._

_OK let me hold up writing this conversation. Scorpy? Who the hell, excuse my French, would want to be called Scorpy? I mean as if Scorpius wasn't a bad name enough she calls me Scorpy. Anyway let me finish writing the conversation._

"_Hi Betty," I said._

"_Did you know when you are in your full study mode your hair in the back of your head stand straight out?" Betty said._

_Pause in the conversation again. Why would anyone care if my hair stands out straight out when I am in my full study mode? Why is it that she even noticed it? Seriously she is a stalker. I tried to get her arrested once for stalking when we were little but that is another story for another time. Any way back to the conversation…_

"_Ok…um thanks for pointing that out." I replied._

"_I love you." Betty said._

_I stared at her. "Ok…um" I stammered on like that until Albus came by._

"_So Scorpius, are you ready for class?" Albus asked._

"_Yes let's go." I said wanting to get away from Betty as fast as I could. We left without waiting for her to say anything._

_Later in the History of Magic class we went to she would not stop staring at me. I am going to ask my father if I can get a restraining order against her._

**Hope you like it! Review!**


	2. Love Potions

**I do not own anything!

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Love Potions

_Ok so I asked my dad about the restraining order and he said that he would try. By try he means that it is his top priority. Between you and me he dislikes Betty as much as I do. So anyway I found out this week that I have a crush on my best friend Albus' cousin Rose Weasley. No I did not tell Albus why would you even ask that? Do you not know what Albus would do to me? Anyway he can not keep a secret either. That is not the worst of it though, you see Rose Weasley hates me. I think it has something to do with her father and before we met or something. Her father Ron does no like me very much. Ooh got to hide the list Betty is coming again._

**5 minutes later**

_Ok my dad needs to hurry up with that restraining order. She made me cupcakes. Now who here thinks I should eat them? I surely do not think I should. Let me just say bad experience in second year eating a cupcake. No Albus. Do not eat the cupcake! Albus is an __**IDIOT**__. He just ate a cupcake. Ha, ha, ha, I was correct it was a love potion. I mean oh no I have to help him. Then again it was his own fault I did warn him not to eat it. What do you mean I have to help him? Fine I will go help him._

**30 minutes later**

_Okay I am back. I help Albus. Ok so here is what happened._

"_NO ALBUS. DO NOT EAT THE CUPCAKE!" I shouted._

_He ate it anyway. What kind of idiot eats it anyway?_

"_You are an idiot." I said._

"_I do not care if I am an idiot, only if I am with my love Betty Parkinson." Albus said._

_Hold on list while I puke…….Done puking._

"_Oh I heard that Lily broke up with Frank and is now dating Max Nott." I said. This should get him out of his trance. He is way to overprotective of that girl._

"_She can date whoever she wants as long as I have Betty." Albus said._

_Again hold for I must puke again. Wow that must have been a lot of love potion to make Albus not care about Lily._

"_Why don't you follow me up stairs and I show you where Betty is." I said. _

"_You really will introduce us. Yes come on Betty is not something we can wait on." Albus said._

_Did he just say something we could not wait on? Oh that is disgusting. I am sure you would think so too if you knew how Betty actually looks. She applies way too much makeup for her own good. Anyway I tied up Albus with rope and put some spells up. He will not be going anywhere. Although it would be funny to see him declare his love for Betty though, but for now he is tied up. You would think he would learn from his mistakes. Oh look an owl. Damn. Dad said I could not get a restraining order. He said it is because she has to be within 150 feet near me during school. You know I could always switch house or better yet have Betty move to someplace far away. Or have her mysterious disappear. No I do not mean kill her. Why would you suggest that? _

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**I hope you like it!****. Review!**


	3. Cats

**No offense to cat lovers. I really love cats. The idea just came into my head.

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**Cats**

_ For those of you wondering Betty did not mysterious disappear. I could have sworn I overlooked all the loop holes. I mean that is a good thing. Anyway in no way is this list number supposed to offense cat lovers. I am pretty sure your cat is the little princess and prince as you call them. So you want to know why I hate cats, well listen to this story. I mean read this story. What am I saying? You are a piece of paper. You can not read or listen to anything I write. I feel really stupid right now. So anyway the horrible experience happened when I was five._

_A five year old Scorpius let me refresh that sentence. An adorable, hot, sexy, wonderful, godly looking five year old Scorpius, no I am not full of myself. Have you been listening to Albus? Well stop. Everything he says is a lie. _

_**Everything I say is not a lie!**_

_STOP WRITING ON MY LIST AL! _

_**Hey at least I am not crushing on my best friend's cousin.**_

_What does that have to do with anything?_

_**Nothing, I just wanted to point that out.**_

_Anyway back to the tale on how I hate cats._

_**You know I do not think this list wants to hear about this. I think the list wants to hear about…ME!!!**_

_SHUT UP AL!_

_**Actually it would be STOP WRITING AL!**_

_**What ever, anyway I was five…**_

_A five year old Scorpius was playing in the back yard of the Malfoy Manner when a beautiful tabby cat ran in the yard. I being the curious child I am…_

_**You know curiosity killed that cat.**_

_No curiosity was framed. Stupidly killed the cat._

_**What ever you say Scorpius, what ever you say.**_

_Anyway I went towards the cat._

_**And the cat bit your finger off.**_

_How did you know?_

_**Wait that beautiful cat really bit your finger off?**_

_Yeah if I did not live in a wizard family then I would only have 9 fingers. Look at the scar._

_**Man that looks like it hurt a lot.**_

_It did._

_**Why are we writing to each other on the paper when we are sitting right next to each other?**_

_I do not know._

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Hope you like it! Review!


	4. Clowns

**Hi! I am back!. **_

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**Clowns**

_In case any of you were wondering the cat happened to be my neighbors and she clearly stated that it was my fault. My fault!!!! Ok so I see maybe I should not have gotten close to the cat and I should not have let my finger near enough to bite it. off. Well anyway you guys are probably going to laugh at me but I hate clowns. _

_**HAHAHA you are scared of clowns.**_

_It is not funny Al. Why would anyone out on a funny suit with polka dots and a red wig giving out people free balloons? DO NOT WATCH IT. Yep there is a movie called It. _

_**I thought your family had only magical things.**_

_They do except my mom's grandma got a TV for my mom at Christmas when I was 6 and my dad got hooked on it. They started watching all kinds of movies and shows. Then one day my dad suggested watching It._

_**Oh come on like there really is a movie called It.**_

_There is. It by Stephen King. The horror, just look him up on the internet._

_**Wait you have the internet?**_

_Yeah my dad got hooked on that too. Anyway the movie was about a killer clown. I am not telling the ending. Just between you and me…_

_**And Albus.**_

_Yes how could I forget you? Just between you, me, and Albus I did not stick around for the ending. _

_**Wimp.**_

_Fine you go and watch it. Here take this laptop that surprisingly works at Hogwarts. Some Muggleborn must have asked for special permission to have a laptop. Her dad must be allergic to owls. Anyway you take this laptop and watch it._

_**Umm… How?**_

_Do I have to do everything around here? Next your going to say 'Scorpius can you take my OWLS for me?' I will be right back._

**10 minutes later.**

_Man Albus is stupid. I mean come on who does not know how to use anything on the computer? I should have probably told Albus that the clown is scary looking and everything but…was that screaming? Oh yeah it was HAHAHAHA Albus came screaming out of the room._

_**Man that clown was a….**_

_No swearing on my list._

_**Sorry. That clown was SCARY!!!!!**_

_See I told you._

_**Thanks a lot jerk. Now when I got to Lily's surprise birthday party on Easter' vacation I am going to be scared for life from the clown they rented.**_

_Have Lily watch the movie so she is scared of clowns and write home to your dad._

_**Good idea. **_

**2 hours later. Give or take a few.**

_So Lily is going to be done watching the movie anytime soon right?_

_**I did not even think she would get past the first couple scenes.**_

_Me neither._

Thanks for letting me watch the movie. It was hilarious. I am going to tell dad to rent me an evil scary clown for my surprise party.

_What you are not scared of the clown?_

_**How do you know about the surprise party?**_

James could never keep a secret. And the clown come on you have to be a moron not to see that it is just an actor with makeup and that the people do not actually die. Oh I got to go. Rose wants me.

_Rose…_

_**Scorpius you are staring at Rose again.**_

_**Scorpius….**_

_**Scorpius knock out of it. **_

_**Hold on list.**_

_OK! OK I AM OUT OF IT. Did you really have to smack me?_

_**Yep.**_

_**Scorpius, where did you go?**_

_**Scorpius….**_

_**I'm all by myself. Don't want to be all by myself. **_

_STOP THE HORRIBLE SINGING! I JUST WENT TO THE BATHROOM! _

**_Sorry._**

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**Albus Potter's Handwriting.**

Lily Potter's Handwriting.

Scorpius Malfoy's handwriting.

**Just to clear that up. Hope you like it. Review!**


	5. Rose Weasley's Boyfriends

**Sorry for the wait. I made this chapter longer then normal.

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Rose Weasley's Boyfriends

_Anyway I figured out that I hate Rose Weasley's boyfriends. No it has nothing to do with that fact that I like her. Shut up Albus I am not in love with her._

_**Sure you are not in love with her. You only stare at her and draw pictures of her because you like her as a friend.**_

Stop teasing him Albus. I think it is sweet that he is in love with Rose.

_I am not in love with Rose._

Then why are you always talking to her? Oh look Rose is over there.

_Where? Where?_

Ha, ha got you.

_Yes ha, ha so funny._

_**Sorry Scorpius but I have to go before anyone sees me in the library with my sister.**_

Hey!

_Yeah Lily is not bad to hang out with._

_**If I did not know you were in love with Rose you would be so dead for liking my sister.**_

_I did not say I liked Lily. I just said she was fun to hang out with. _

_Honestly._

It is alright. Albus just can't handle how awesome I am.

_If you say so, anyway back with my story._

_Rose is going out with Michael Brown. By the way he is a man s***._

He is not a man, oh wait he is. I do not see what Rose sees in him.

_Yes someone who agrees with me. I told that to Albus and he said, and I quote 'Michael is not a man s***. You are only saying that because you like my cousin.'_

Albus can be such an idiot sometimes.

_I know. Anyway back to the story._

_I mean he goes to girl to girl for grownup things that I am not aloud to mention in this list_

How come?

_How come what?_

How come you are not allowed to mention grown up things?

_Because McGonagall is going to look at this list when I am done, she said I had to work out my anger on this piece of paper. You did not actually think I would write a list on the things I hate did you?_

Yes I did. Seeing as Rose is writing one.

_She is? Does she say anything bad about me in it?_

I do not know. When anyone comes near her she hides the list.

_Probably telling the list how she is in love with Michael. Why doesn't she like me?_

Um… maybe because her father might have, probably did, actually did tell her not to be friends with you and to beat you in every test.

_So that is why she always tries so hard to beat me. If she was really smart she would see that I let her win no matter how hard she studied._

Aw, that is so sweet. Now back to the story you were telling, writing to me about.

_Ok_

_Who does that? And the only reason I know this is because he did the grownup things with my girlfriend who is now ex-girlfriend Anna Nott. I would write down what happened but I rather not and spare you the horrid details. _

Oh come on it was not that horrid.

_Yes it was. Back to my story and stop interrupting my writing._

Sorry.

_No I am not a drama queen, how dare you ask that._

You kind of are.

**Hey what are you guys writing about?**

ROSE. What are you doing, writing here for?

**I was just wondering what you were writing. Why are you and Malfoy covering the first half of the paper?**

Oh um…because it is a secret.

**Are you to a couple? Wait to Albus hears this. **

No Rose wait. We are not a couple.

_Why did you write that instead of yelling it?_

I do not know. Now let's finish the story before she comes back.

_Oh right._

_Oh you did not ask that. Then again you are just a piece of paper. Ok now I feel really stupid._

You are…

_Shut up Lily. I wrote this on my homework before I put it on the list. Sorry for writing how stupid I felt in History of Magic._

_It takes a lot to make me feel stupid. Oh no here comes Betty. _

That was not part of your story.

_No but look it is Betty. Get under the table._

Why?

_Just do it._

**5 minutes later:**

Did that just happen?

_Yes Rose is finally broken up with her boyfriend. I tell you this story. It is way more interesting then my last._

What was your last story about anyway?

_Nothing really, I was hoping something would happen so I could right about it._

Ok.

_Ok list here is some important advices never try to hide from a girl who is completely obsessed with you. It ends badly._

Why did you write that down? It did not end that badly.

_I never said it ended badly for us._

Oh.

_So here Lily and I were hiding under the table, Betty of course did not see us._

Just get to the point.

_So here Lily and I were just hiding here when Betty starts to speak._

"_What took you so long to get here?" Betty said._

"_Well sorry, I had to lose the pathetic Weasley."_

My cousin is not pathetic.

_I am just writing how it happened._

_Michael Brown said. "She was telling me how Lily Potter and Scorpius Malfoy were dating."_

WE ARE NOT DATING!

_I know that Lily. I am just writing what happen._

_Then Brown did something we never expected, well actually I did expect it but never mind. Brown kissed Betty. He kissed her as if that wasn't bad enough Rose walked in on them kissing._

You should have see Rose's face.

_I shall let you know Rose knows __**A LOT**__ of magic. I hope my bolding and capital letters helped to tell you what I mean by a lot of magic._

I am sure it did Scorpius.

_**Hey did you guys here what happened with Rose and Michael.**_

Oh so now I am cool enough to hang out with.

_**Yes and what is this I hear about YOU AND SCORPIUS DATING?**_

_Just read what happened earlier._

_**Wow. Rose wrote on your list.**_

_Yep. I was shocked myself._

Shut up or I will write what happened next.

_Sorry Lily._

_I do not think Michael will be able to sit down for weeks. I wonder if I can get Michael Brown arrested for cheating I shall ask my dad. _

_**Yes you do ask your dad. I will ask my dad to.**_

_How would that help?_

Do Albus and my father is Harry Potter. He defeated Voldemort. I am sure he could do anything.

_**Hey Scorpius, what are you doing sitting here when the love of your life is out there crying waiting for someone to comfort her.**_

_Really, got to go. _

That was nice.

_**Yep sometimes you have to push him in the right direction.**_

_What is with this talk I hear about Lily dating Malfoy._

Hi James and I thought you like Scorpius.

_I do when he is not dating my sister._

_**Relax they are not dating. **_

_What?_

Read what happened above.

_Ok… Dude he has it bad, but now I have to go. There is someone by the name of Michael getting beat up tonight._

_**Bye, have fun.**_

Do you think we should stop him?

_**Probably, but I really do not see the point.**_

My words exactly.

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_Scorpius Malfoys handwriting._

**_Albus Potter's handwriting._**

Lily Potter's handwriting.

**Rose Weasely's handwriting.**

_James Potter's handwriting._

I think that is it. Review!


	6. Being Jealous

Another chapter done. Thank you all for the reviews._

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_Hey Scorpius are you going to ask Rose to the Yule Ball?_

_I would James, I really would. There are just a few problems._

Like what?

_Hey Lily, when did you get here?_

Just now, so what are the problems?

_**Well for number one…Rose Weasley hates his guts.**_

_Oh come off it. Rose may dislike him, but hate is such a strong word._

_**No I am pretty sure she hates him. I mean it is all Uncle Ron's fault.**_

_How?_

On Rose's and Albus' first train ride to Hogwarts Uncle Ron kind of said to Rose not to get friendly with you.

_I think there was also and I quote 'Granddad Weasley would never forgive you if you married a pureblood.'_

_So that is why she hates me. Would your Granddad really never forgive her if she married a pureblood?_

_Granddad probably would not care, but Ron might depending who the pureblood is._

_Damn._

_Hey no swearing. There are innocent ears here._

What! I have heard swearing before.

_I wasn't talking to you Lily. I was talking about Albus._

_**HEY!**_

Oh that makes sense. Oh look there is Frank. I see you guys later.

**_BY LILY!_**

_Why are you shouting?_

**_I do not know. Hey how come you are writing on Scorpius list anyway? Don't you have any friends?_**

_Yes, but they are all on dates._

_Then why don't you get a girlfriend._

_I would, I really would, but I can not be bothered right now. I am single and I like it._

_**Sure. So Scorpius can your dad get Michael arrested?**_

_Yeah are dad said he could not. How could he not? He is Harry Bloody Potter. He saved the world and yet he can't get a guy arrested._

_My dad said he could not ether. Hey do you think your dad could get a restraining order against Betty to not be able to come within 1,000 feet of me. Lets make it 100,000,000 miles from me._

_Probably not, I think the other schools are within 1,000,000,000 miles of us. Sorry Scorpius. Maybe she will mysteriously disappear._

_Nope I already tried that. I could have sworn I looked up the loop holes._

… _**I am going to pretend I did not hear that.**_

_Me to. _

I hate Rose right now.

_Hi Lily, how come you are back so soon? And why do you hate Rose?_

My boyfriend, I mean ex boyfriend just dumped me because he believed that I was cheating on him with you. How could he think that? It is not like I am always near you.

_Well Lily you are kind of always near him. I mean writing on his list counts as being near him._

Well I am sorry if I am trying to help him get with Rose. Mind you it has to be before the year ends.

_Why?_

_**NO REASON.**_

_NO REASON._

The whole school except you and Rose made a bet when you two would get together.

_**LILY!**_

_Yeah way to go Lily, tell one of the people we are betting on that we made a bet off of him._

Anyway Scorpius will you go to the ball with me.

_WHAT!_

_**WHAT!**_

…

Relax I mean as friends. It is a win/win situation for both of us.

_How?_

_Yes Lily how?_

Well for me my brother's don't have to kill the poor soul who would go with me and it would make Frank jealous.

_**How does that benefit Scorpius?**_

I was getting to the point.

**Hey Lily I have to talk to you.**

**What is with you people hiding the paper when I show up?**

Hi Rose. Why didn't you just ask me to talk to you then write it down?

**I did. I was standing there for twenty minute trying to get your attention. What are you guys talking about and why are you hiding the paper.**

**There you are Rose. I have been looking all over for you.**

**Why?**

**Dad sent you a letter.**

**Really, never mind Lily I will talk to you later.**

By Rose, thank you Hugo. You are a lifesaver.

**Your welcome.**

Anyway it benefits Scorpius because he has a date and does not have to worry about Betty trying to slip him love potion again.

**Wait what is going on?**

_Read above._

**YOU LIKE MY SISTER!**

_**Like is the wrong word. He loves Rose.**_

**YOU LOVE MY SISTER!**

_ALBUS!_

_**Sorry.**_

**Oddly enough I am okay with it.**

_**WHAT!**_

_WHAT!_

_WHAT!_

WHAT!

**I always expected Rose to end up with Scorpius. Anyway it is better then her marrying someone else.**

Anyway it also benefits Scorpius because it will make Rose jealous.

_Sure it will._

It will make her Jealous James.

**After the ball:**

See the ball was not that bad.

_Yeah, but I do not think that Rose was really jealous._

Yes but did you see Frank.

**Yes we did see Frank. He could not stop staring at you.**

_Yes, isn't it beautiful?_

_**What is beautiful James?**_

_Young love._

_**If you say so.**_

_Oh I know so._

_Hey guys how did this get to be a list where we just talk instead of my personal hate list?_

Just tell the list that you hate being jealous. That would work.

_Except for the fact that you just wrote that on the list._

Well sorry.

_Yeah, you are suppose to let your anger out on the paper not us._

_But you are writing on my paper._

I would like to say that it is five minutes till curfew is over. To your common rooms now.

_Yes Minnie._

JAMES!

_Time to run._

JAMES SIRIUS POTTER!

_Bye Minnie._

**I think we should go to are common rooms before she comes back and takes any points off of us.**

Good point. Bye Scorpius.

_Bye Lily._

Just to clear this off.

_Scorpius Malfoys handwriting._

**_Albus Potter's handwriting._**

Lily Potter's handwriting.

_James Potter's handwriting._

**Rose Weasley's handwriting.**

**Hugo Weasley's handwriting.**

Proffessor McGonagall's handwriting.

I think that is it.

Hope you liked it. Review!


	7. Rose's Annoying Cousins

_Sorry about the last chapter. Hugo's handwriting swiched from being underlined to not. I fixed it i think. Here is the next chapter.

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Professor McGonagall can be so demanding.

We should count are selves lucky. James has a month of detentions just for calling her Minnie.

_Yes I do feel sorry for James, but he did bring it on himself._

_I did not bring it on mydrlg. How was I suppose to know she was moody around midnight?_

_**Hey guys. Have you seen Rose anywhere?**_

Yeah. The last I saw her she was talking to a Ravenclaw boy.

_What! Who is this guy? Does she like him? Why can't she like me? _

**I think it has something to do with my father.**

_Hey Hugo! When did you get here?_

**I always been here. You guys were too busy writing on this piece of paper to notice. Oh God. Rose is coming. Hide the list.**

**Again why do you always hide the piece of paper every time I come near?**

_We hide it so you don't find out that I…_

**Shut up. I was not talking to you.**

He was just answering your question.

**Of course take his side.**

**We are not taking sides.**

**Whatever.**

_Don't worry Scorpius. It is Uncle Ron's fault. She will eventually get in to the 'Rebel against the parents stage' and fall in love with you._

**HA,HA Like that would ever happen. Rose is such a daddy's girl. **

_Thanks Hugo. I feel so much better._

**You are welcome. Always nice to help a friend.**

_I was being sarcastic._

**Oh.**

_You know it is great being single and all (Single girls call me) but not when all my friends are dating._

I would like to take the time to remind Scorpius that he is suppose to write all of his anger out on this piece of paper. Not a place where you are all to lazy to talk to each other so you write it down on paper.

_**We are not lazy. We are just practicing our handwriting.**_

Well do that on some other piece of paper. When I read this list it better not just be you guys talking about Scorpius love life or any of your guy's problems. It is suppose to be Scorpius writing about his feelings.

'_He is supposed to be writing his feelings.' Who does that bit…_

I AN STILL HERE!

_I was going to say 'Who does that beautiful, awesome witch…_

It's not working. 

_Damn. What is my punishment?_

Add another week of detention.

_That is not so bad._

I was not finish. 50 points will be taken off also. NOW LEAVE SCORPIUS ALONE SO HE CAN WRITE ABOUT HIS FEELINGS!

And she is gone. I can not believe she actually thought you would write about your feelings.

_I know. What does she think I am? Gay?_

_**Well you do tend to pay more attention to your hair then most guys. Plus you spend a lot of time in the shower.**_

**No, Scorpius is not gay. I can not have a gay guy married to my sister.**

Why? What do you have against gay guys?

**Nothing. If Scorpius was gay then he would not be able to like Rose. Seeing as he would like guys and I would lose my 50 galleon bet.**

Oh I see now. SCORPIUS YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO TURN GAY TILL AFTER YOU AND ROSE GET TOGETHER SO I CAN WIN MY BET. Do I make myself clear?

_Relax guys. The last time I checked I was in love with Rose._

_Good. Hey what are you going to call this number in the hate list?_

_I don't know. How about 'Rose's annoying cousins'?_

_**No, that will not work. How about 'Albus is awesome and I wish I was as awesome as him'**_

Oh no. If he was going to name it that it would be. 'Lily is awesome and I wish I was as awesome as her'

_Clearly you are all missing the point. He is going to call it 'James Sirius Potter is the hottest guy in the school. We should all bow down to him'_

_**Hate to break this to you James but that is too long.**_

Hey where is Scorpius?

_Yeah where did he go?_

**Guys look at the title.**

_Rose's annoying cousins. He can not name it that._

He already did.

_**Where do you think he went?**_

**He probably went to stare at Rose in some dark corner.**

Let's go find him.

_Finally they are gone. Is it just me or do the Potter's seem a little full of themselves? _

Not as long as the last two chapters. Anyway the handwriting is...

_Scorpius Malfoy_

**_Albus Potter_**

Lily Potter

_James Potter_

**Rose Weasley**

**Hugo Weasley**

Professor McGonagall

Hope you like it! Review!


	8. Ron Weasley

Another chapter done! Thank you for all the reviews!

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I decide to write what I hate first before they find me. By they I mean Albus, Lily, James, Hugo, and occasionally Rose. Rose....I am going to stop dreaming into space now. I have two weeks of detention because my list barely had anything I hate in it. I know! Give me detention, she should give them detention. They are the people stopping me from writing my feelings. I did not just write that did I?

_**Yes you did.**_

_What! You found me already._

_Yep. _

_How? I thought my hiding spot really good._

It helps when you have a map.

_What map?_

**What map? What map? I can not believe you just said that.**

_All I said was what map._

_The Marauder's map is the map we are talking about._

_And that tells me what?_

_**Don't you know who the Marauders are?**_

_No. Is it someone I should?_

He did not just say that he did not know who the Marauders are did he?

**I believe he did Lily. I believe he did.**

Gasp!

_Ok can someone tell me who they are?_

_They are legendary._

_Apparently they are not legendary if I have no clue who they are._

_**Everyone knows who they are. Just ask Minnie. She even knows.**_

_Fine I will go ask her._

**He is gone.**

_You would think he would be more careful where he leaves his list._

_**Yeah. For all he knows we could just take this list and hand it to Rose.**_

We can not do that! Scorpius has to tell her he loves her himself.

**Scorpius loves who?**

_**Rose!**_

**Yeah I am here. Who does Scorpius love?**

**Rose!**

**I think Albus just pointed out that I am here. Now tell me who does Scorpius love?**

_Rose!_

**Oh for the love of Merlin. I will just figure it out on my own.**

_Didn't I just tell her who Scorpius loved?_

_**Yeah I told her too.**_

**Yeah so did I.**

_I asked Minnie and she said….Oh my..._

_You better finish that with gosh._

_Oh my gosh! You told Rose I loved her!  
_

_**No you see we told Rose, but she did not believe us.**_

Actually Rose thought you were just pointing out that she was here.

_No offense to your sister Hugo. But she can be really stupid sometimes,_

**None taken, I am just wondering why she wanted to know who Scorpius was in love with.**

Yeah. I was wondering that too.

_So Scorpius, what did Minnie tell you._

_She said that the Marauders were a pain in her behind. She also said that you were just like them. _

_Yes! I knew I was just like them!  
_

_She was talking about Al._

_Damn._

_I am kidding. But she did say that I had to have something I hate on today's list._

**I got one. I hate Ron Weasley.**

_And why would I hate Ron Weasley?_

**Because he is the reason you will never, ever get to be with Rose.**

_Why?_

**Because he hates your guts and Rose is such a daddy's girl she will do anything to live up to his expectations.**

_Well that is stupid. She should live up to her expectations not her fathers._

**That is what I said.**

_Hey where did the Potter's go?_

**I don't know.**

_**I am back. **_

**Where did you go?**

_**Oh just to help set up plan A.W.E.S.O.M.E.**_

_And what does that stand for?_

_**I not exactly sure, James picked it.**_

**So what is the prank?**

_**I can not write it on paper.**_

_Why?_

_**It might get into the wrong hands.**_

**Oh.**

…_**.**_

**Whoa!**

_Yeah whoa! Won't you get into trouble for doing that?_

_**Probably, but who cares. Oh got to go, James and Lily calling.**_

_How were they calling him?_

**You do not want to know.**

So Scorpius do you have a hate thing for this list.

_Yes Professor._

May I know what it is?

_Sure Professor._

What is it?

_Ron Weasley._

May I ask why you hate Ron Weasley?

_I hate him because he is the reason Rose will never be with me!_

Ok…

Oh look at the time. I have to go.

**I think your shouting might have scared her. It scared me.**

_Oh shut it._

**I did it! I finally figured out who you are in love with.**

_Really you did?_

**Yep. You are in love with Alice Longbottom.**

……

**You do realize that Alice is in James' year right?**

**So, he can like someone older then him.**

**Yeah, but if Scorpius liked Alice, James would kill him.**

**James would not kill him.**

_**Yes he would.**_

**Hi Albus! I finally figured out who Scorpius likes.**

_**Really!**_

**Do not get your hopes up Al. She thinks Scorpius likes Alice.**

_**He can't. James would kill him.**_

**No he would not. Scorpius is in love with Alice. Wait till I tell her.**

_No! Rose wait!_

Dude you are screwed.

_You are lucky I know that you are in love with Rose or I would have to kill you._

**See I was right! James loves Alice!**

_**Sucks to be you, Professor Longbottom is scary.**_

No he isn't.

_You have to look at it from a boy's point of view. You see Frank is probably scared half to death by your father._

No he isn't.

_Yes he is._

_Oh and McGonagall took the 'I hate Ron Weasley' as a list number. _

_That is great! Now we can write to each other without Minnie sticking her nose in our business._

_**I still do not see why we do not just talk to each other. I mean we are right next to each other.**_

_Yes but writing is more fun._

And it is private.

_By the way did you get back with Frank yet?_

Yeah! He said he was wrong about dumping me.

_Sure he did._

James!

_I mean I am so glad that my little sister is back with her boyfriend._

_**Hey James, how come you are not hanging out with your friends? I know for sure that they are not on dates.**_

_I am not hanging out with them because um…._

He is not hanging out with them because we are more fun to be around.

_That is about it._

_Oh. Does anyone else have the craving for pizza?_

_**I do!  
**_

So do I?

_To the kitchens we must go!_

* * *

_Scorpius Malfoy_

**_Albus Potter_**

Lily Potter

_James Potter_

**Rose Weasley**

**Hugo Weasley**

Professor McGonagall

Review!


	9. Chocolate Bananas and Barbie Dolls

_Another chapter!

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_

Okay before anyone of you ask. I am in Myrtle's bathroom, Moaning Myrtle's bathroom that is. The reason I am in here is because they will never find me here! Even if they do with that map of theirs, they would never dare go in here!

_**Hey Scorpius!**_

_Yeah hello! Any reason we are writing in a bathroom?_

_Okay let me rephrase my last sentence. They would dare come in here. Damn and I thought I had a very good hiding spot._

**Why are you hiding? I thought we already told you we would not do anything to you when you and Rose get together. We are going to leave that to all of our other cousins and Uncles and Aunts.**

_Damn. Would they give me hell if I was the girl and Rose was the boy?_

_Nope your parents would be the overprotective idiots. Believe me I wished to be the girl. Professor Longbottom is scary. _

Believe me Scorpius. You do not want to be a girl! Think of the monthly torture.

_What is the monthly torture?_

I will whisper it in your ear.

_**I wonder what his reaction will be.**_

_You have to go through with that once every month! _

Yep!

_I am never becoming a girl! Never! _

_It is not that bad._

_**What are you talking about? You never were a girl.**_

_Prank gone wrong is all I am saying._

**Yikes! **

**Hugo Weasley! This is a girl's bathroom!**

**Why are you only yelling at me? Scorpius, Albus, and James are in here too.**

**Oh yes that reminds me. Scorpius and James! This is a girls bathroom!**

_Thanks a lot Hugo._

_Hey what about Al?_

**I like Al.**

_You are a hypocrite._

**How?**

_Just...you…um…you just are._

_**Wow Scorpius. Nice comeback.**_

_Yeah Scorpius, that will totally let you win this fight._

**Shut up! I am not a hypocrite!**

_Yes you are! Just like all your stupid cousins._

HEY!

_**HEY!**_

**HEY!**

_Yeah like hey! _

_Oh sorry I mean all your other stupid cousins who are not in this room._

_Much better!_

**My cousins are not stupid! **

_Yes they are! Just like your dad!_

_**Whoa he said that to her face.**_

**Well my dad can be stupid at times.**

Your dad can be stupid a lot of times. Especially when he is drunk.

**My dad is not stupid! He just does not like to show his smart side! You are stupid.**

_I am so not stupid. Do you like chocolate covered bananas? _

**What?**

Well that is a way to stop a conversation.

_I mean really. Bananas are okay fruit. You would think dipping them in chocolate they would taste better. But no! They taste disgusting._

**How does that go into are fight?**

_Nothing, you already won the fight anyway._

_**Hey! Wait a minute! Did Scorpius just say that Rose won a fight? Oh my god what has the world come too?**_

_Totally destruction and I am so not the reason for it! So I can not get grounded! Yes!_

_Is James okay?_

He was dropped on his head when he was a baby.

_Okay that makes much sense. Back to the topic of chocolate covered bananas._

_I agree with you. They are not that good._

_**Yes they are! Especially when you add sprinkles lots and lots of pink sprinkles.**_

_Umm…Al. That sounded really…um gay._

_Yeah and pink is kind of a gay color._

_**What are you suggesting?**_

Are you gay?

_**No! How dare you suggest that!**_

_It is okay if you are._

_**I am not! I am leaving to go somewhere where they respect me!**_

_Yep. He is in denial._

Or he is not gay at all and he is really just acting out for attention from my parents.

_That could be it too._

_But seriously, Al is wrong. Bananas are just gross. They should not even exist. _

Bananas are good, just not in chocolate.

**Guys, you do realize that we are on the floor outside of the bathroom right?**

_We are? How did we get here?_

**During Rose and your fight, you were caring the list with you as you went out side of the bathroom.**

_Then why are we on the floor?_

**We got tired of standing and we all just sat down.**

_Oh._

Do you have a topic for today Scorpius?

_Minnie! When did you get here?_

Just now, so what is your topic?

_Chocolate covered bananas. I hate them._

Chocolate covered bananas are delicious. Choose another topic.

_Okay. I hate Barbie dolls._

You hate what?

_He said Barbie dolls. They are a Muggle toy girls play with. Lily use to have a bunch._

James!

_Yes, but Barbie also seems to have a new job every week. She is also too perfect! She has to be evil!_

Yes well that will do. By the way, how is your crush on Rose coming a long?

_What! How do you know about my crush on Rose?_

You told me on this list a while back. Anyway the whole school knows. 

**Everyone except Rose knows.**

Doesn't she still think that he loves Alice?

_Yes._

Wait Scorpius loves Rose? Wait till Ron and Draco here about this.

_Oh god. I forgot about them finding out. Actually my dad is cool with it. He thinks will bring peace between are families._

So does my mom! She believes that Uncle Ron jinxed it and that you two are going to get together.

_Now that I think about it, I want 50 percent of all the money you get._

_No! 5 percent!_

_40 percent!_

_10 percent!_

_39 percent!_

_20 percent!_

_60 percent!_

_No 50 percent and that is finial._

_I will take 50 percent._

_What! No I mean. I hate you._

_I know, I know._

_

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_

**Another chapter done. Hopefully you know whos handwriting is whos by now.**


	10. Attentions disorders and Therapists

**Just wanted to thank everyone for there reviews!**_

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_

_Albus is not gay! He just has a mental attention disorder._

Poor Al. It is a fact that I am Harry's favorite.

_And I am Ginny's favorite._

_What I can not understand is how they can favor two out of three of their children._

_**You would not understand. You are an only child.**_

**It is alright Al. Scorpius dones not know any better. 'Sends paper glare at Scorpius.**

_Stop with the written glares. They are freaking me out. Anyway if it makes you feel anybetter I also have a mental attention disorder._

What? Why? You are an only child. How can you have an attention disorder?

_I am not exactly sure. My father has the same disorder too._

_Is that why you are always fighting with Rose?_

_No! Rose is the one who always starts the fight._

**I do not!**

**Hey Rose! When did you get here?**

**Not that long ago. Sorry to hear about your disorder Al.**

Hey James!

_What?_

Alice is over there.

_Really?_

Yes! Now ask her on a date!

_What if she says no?_

_**Relax James. She is not going to say no.**_

_I don't know. I still think she is going to say no._

**I will ask her for you then.**

**Wow James. I can not believe that you are letting Rose ask out Alice for you. That is so unmanly.**

_You are right Hugo. I am going out there and ask Alice out myself._

**And that is how it is done.**

Wow. If only you could get Scorpius to follow that advice on Rose.

_**That would be the day.**_

**Too bad it is not going to happen.**

_I am still here you know!_

_Yes! Yes! Yes! Alice said yes!_

**Like you had any doubt. Why are you covering the paper Scorpius?**

_No reason._

**Well I have to go.**

**By Rosie!**

**That was nice.**

_**So James, when is your date?**_

_Next Saturday. I can not wait!_

We can tell. Can you stop jumping? You are shaking the table.

_Oops, sorry._

_So have I told any of you the story when I fell out a window?_

_**You fell out of a window? My poor baby!**_

_Betty! What are you doing here writing on my list?_

_**Yeah why are you on his list?**_

_**He is the love of my life? We are going to get married and have one angel child. Why shouldn't I write on the list.**_

_Betty for the last time, I do not like you! _

_**Stop playing hard to get Scorpy. We all know you love me.**_

_Hey Betty! Michael is in that broom closet waiting for you!_

_**Really? See you later Scorpy!**_

…

_And look she is gone!_

You locked her in a broom closet.

_So? She was being annoying._

Have any of you seen Betty anywhere? 

_**Nope! Why didn't you ask that instead of writing it down.**_

Because you did not here me, you guys do not know how tough it is being the headmaster.

_Ok._

I mean you have all this paper work, then you have students who don't listen to you, and to top that all out the other teachers leave me out on out of school activities. I can be fun. 

**And how does that make you feel?**

It makes me feel unappreciated.

Yes I can see the problem.

Yes and what is my problem?

_You need to tell the other professors that when they leave you out of there our of school activities that it hurts your feelings._

_Also try having party's for the students at Hogwarts. They will appreciate you more._

Oh thanks for the advice. Do you have a topic for today Scorpius?

_Yes! Attention disorders and therapists._

That is fine. I have to go talk to the other teachers.

_That was just what is the word?_

**Plain weird.**

_My thoughts exactly._

_Oh look it is Alice! See you guys!_

_Well I have to go study. Bye guys. _

_Guys I have to take the list with me._

_Just let go of the list!_

_Thank you._

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If you did not figure it out already **Betty's handwriting is this. **  
Review!


	11. Nigthmares and Lamas

_Another chapter done!

* * *

_

Okay list. I have something important to tell you.

_**What is it? Did you wet the bed again?**_

_I have never wet the bed in my life!_

It is okay Scorpius. You do not have to lie. We will not make fun of you. And James is on his date so he will never know.

_So yes I did wet the bed._

_**Hahahahahahahahahaha!**_

_It is not funny! I had a nightmare of Betty._

What was the nightmare about?

_So my nightmare started out with me sitting under the tree by the lake. I was wearing a tuxedo. Then the bride started coming down the isle. The bride first was Rose, and then it turned into Betty an evil Betty. When she was standing next to me she whispered into my ear all these horrible things she was going to do to me. Then the person getting us married happened to be Rose Weasley. She had this evil smile on her face. Then a black hole appeared under my feet and I was in a black room. Then all of the sudden flames burst everywhere. Then James appeared on a throne in the middle of the flames. He said I would rot in this prison hell for the rest of my life because I was in love with Rose. Then Betty comes back in the picture ridding a lama. I am freaking out I woke up and wet my pants._

**What is with the lama in the ending of your dream?**

_I do not know! That is why I am freaking out!_

_Hey guys what is going on? My date was great. _

…

_You wet your pants? _

_What is with the lama at the end of your nightmare?_

He does not know? It is freaking us out.

_**I think he can see that.**_

_And what is it with me being the evil person?  
_

_I do not know. It was a dream._

_**Scorpy! I just mailed my parents to see if the could arrange us to be married! I am planning to have my wedding at Hogwarts! With lamas!**_

_AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! _

_**Scorpy where did you go?**_

_**He had to use the loo.**_

_**Ooh. I better start looking for my dress.**_

**Man poor Scorpius. I pity whoever has to marry her.**

_Where did Scorpius go?_

I do not know? He just ran when she mentioned lamas.

Where is Scorpius?

_We are not sure. He ran when Betty started writing._

Oh, does he have any ideas for his list today?

_**Yep! It is Nightmares and Lamas.**_

Odd title, may I ask why?

Sure. Just read from the beginning.

…

What is with the lama at the end?

**We are not sure.**

_But it really freaked Scorpius out._

I can see. I think that Scorpius may need therapy. I will write a letter to his father about that.

_Okay I am back! _

_What happen? _

_That is a nice title._

_I do not need therapy! I am perfectly sane thank you very much!_

_**You must not be very sane if you are talking to a list.**_

_Shut up!_

**Hey guys! Have you seen Lily? I need to talk to her.**

_Hey Rose!_

**Why are you covering the paper?**

**I am really starting to think that you are all in one weird relationship.**

_I am dating Alice!_

**I never said that she wasn't in your relationship. What is next? All of you holding hands walking in to the Great Hall.**

Maybe, what did you want Rose.

**I was wondering if you would do a double date with me and Harry Newman. **

_Who?_

**Harry Newman. He is the hot guy in Ravenclaw.**

_No comment._

**Oh and did you guys know they have this lama in the Great Hall.**

_AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!_

_**Well it looks like Scorpius is done writing for today.**_

_Ouch that looked like it hurt._

**Really hurt.**

Bye!

* * *

Review!


	12. Sickness and Betty

_I do not own anything!

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_

Sorry for not writing sooner, but I just got out of the hospital wing. Note to everyone. Do not run into a library bookshelf it hurts. Especially when the reason you are running is because someone said there was a lama in the Great Hall. Let me repeat it hurts! Anyway Rose and I are one step closer to starting a relationship. She called me by my first name. I am so excited.

_**The only reason she called you your first name was because Minnie said she had to act more civil to you if she wanted to keep her perfect badge.**_

_Thank you Albus for ruining my hope on Rose's and my relationship._

_What relationship? She hates your guts._

James!

_What it is true._

**She meant James as in 'James you idiot! Don't try to get his hopes down!**

_Sorry._

I come to inform James, Lily, and Albus that there father is here to see them.

_Really, crap, what did I do? What is he going to yell at me for? Think James Think. _

He just stopped by to tell you news. 

_Oh good. I thought it had something to do with the prank with the butterflies._

_**James!**_

That was you? It took me forever to get all the butterflies out of my classroom. 

Yeah so anyway where is our father?

In my office, come on I will take you to him.

_They are gone. I am all by myself. Guess I will go study._

…

…

…

_Ok I am so done studying. _

**Hey Scorpius.**

_Where did you go? Lily, James, and Albus left to see there father and you just disappear._

**I will tell you, but you can not tell any of my cousins, including Lily, James, Albus, and Rose.**

_Your secret is safe with me._

**I have a girlfriend.**

_That is great, but why don't you want to tell you cousins?_

**It is a Hufflepuff girlfriend.**

_So, what is the matter of telling your cousins that you have a Hufflepuff girlfriend?_

**James would tease me.**

_Why would I tease Hugo?_

_Why are you covering the paper Hugo? Now I know how Rose feels._

_**They are just talking about Hugo's new girlfriend. She is a Hufflepuff.**_

_Stop writing on my paper Betty!_

_**Hufflepuff girlfriend did she say?**_

**I am ready for your teasing.**

They are not going to tease you, right Albus and James.

_Right._

_**Right.**_

_So what did your father want?_

_He just wanted to tell us that Teddy and Victoire are engage. Not a big deal._

_**Yes it is! Now Teddy will really be family.**_

Hey! That is my line.

**And how come I wasn't told this news?**

**You were not told this because our parents like me more, come on Hugo are dad is here to tell us the news.**

**How long have you been there Rose?**

**I have been here since James, Albus, and Lily came back. Now come on.**

_Do you think she is starting to like me? I mean she writes on my list._

_**Don't know, it is hard to tell with Rose.**_

_Hey Scorpius is that your owl?_

_Yes._

She has a letter.

_It is a he._

Fine, he has a letter.

_Much better…_

_**I wonder who wrote him a letter.**_

_Probably his dad._

_**Who was the letter from?**_

_My dad._

_Knew it!_

What does is say?

_It says _

'_Dear Scorpius,_

_How has your school year been going? Christmas is coming soon and I regret to inform you that your grandfather has fallen ill and his sickness is contagious. To save you from his sickness (which by the way is horrible. Your mother, grandma, and grandpa all have it.) I am going to ask you to please stay at Hogwarts or ask your friend Albus if you can stay at his house. (His dad is a real softy.) _

_Love,_

_Your father._

_**My father is not a softy!**_

Actually Al our father is a softy. I mean who lets their wife name there kid Albus Severus Potter, it is just asking for the kid to be picked on.

_**Yeah, I mean my name is awesome!**_

_**You could come over to my house Scorpy.**_

_No thank you Beth._

_**My name is Betty, I will let the mistake slide.**_

_Oh please don't._

**Guys I am back.**

**Guys?**

**Hello?**

**I guess I will go find my girlfriend.**

Hope you liked it! Review!


	13. Mr Weasley and Hot Soup

_Thank you all for the reviews! _

Just a note:

Harry Potter's handwriting. This is just for this chapter.

_**"Ginny's handwriting." This is also just for this chapter.**_

For some reason I can not underline Hugo. Since Rose is not in this chapter Hugo's handwriting is **Bold.**

_

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___

I think your father hates me.

**Why do you think that?**

_Reason 1, I came into your house with the Potters and he did not say hi to me. He did not greet me at all._

**He does not say hi to a lot of people.**

_Yes because that warm hearted greeting he gave to everyone but me including Professor Longbottom does not count._

**I was just trying to make you feel better. And just that one reason does not mean he hates you.**

_Reason two. He 'accidentally' pushed me down a flight of stairs. That hurt a lot!_

Uncle Ron pushed you down the stairs?!

_Yes he did Lily. Where were you?_

**My dad did not push Scorpius down a flight of stairs. He accidentally bumped into Scorpius.**

_Say what you want Hugo but we all know it wasn't an accident. The adults other the Ron and Hermione believe me and Scorpius._

_And I do not think what Al said to Ron helped in his liking me department._

What did Al say? I really have to stop using the bathroom.

_Al said to Uncle Ron after the stairs incident and I quote 'Uncle Ron you should be nicer to Scorpius Soon enough he will be your son in law.'_

**You should have seen Rose's face. She was either blushing from embarrassment or anger.**

_**It was anger. I just got away from her. She is mad at me because she got grounded for a week. Uncle Ron is not happy. I wonder why, all I did was tell him the truth. **_

Hey Guys. I would like to apologies to Scorpius on Ron's behalf. Somewhere deep down in his heart he is sorry for pushing you down the stairs.

_See I told you Hugo! Even my dad agrees with me!_

_Um…thanks Mr. P. but how come you did not say that out loud?_

I did. It seems the only way to get your attention when you are not in classes is by writing on this piece of paper. Professor McGonagall told me about it.

_**Whatever Minnie said was a lie!**_

Really, cause I have been standing in this room for ten minutes why you guys were writing on the paper. Why are you writing on this paper anyway?

_Minnie said I had to write down my feelings down on paper creating a list. I was doing that in a manly way for the first to things on my list, but Al started writing on my paper and soon everyone was._

Oh. There was something else I was supposed to tell you. Oh now I remember. Dinner is ready.

**After dinner:**

**I can not believe my dad did that.**

_I can not believe Uncle Ron did that either._

At least everyone knows that it was on purpose. Has he come out of the bathroom yet?

_**No, my mom went to our house to get a new set of clothes. Who new Ron would do that in front of everyone. Clearly everyone could see it was not an accident. **_

I know. He is still trying to deny that he did anything.

**We know that Lily. We can hear Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron yelling at each other.**

James, Lily, Albus we are leaving now. Scorpius has a slight burn over the area Ron spilled the hot soup on him.

_**Don't forget the hot chocolate too. I new Ron was being too nice to us kids. He never gives us hot chocolate with dinner.**_

Is he going to be alright daddy?

He should be fine, but I do not think we will bring him to Ron's house again. It is going to suck when Rose and Scorpius get married.

_Does everyone know I like Rose?_

_Scorpius you missed spelled a word._

_How?_

_Love is spelled like this L O V E. You accidentally spelled it like this L I K E. It is an easy mistake._

So you are in love with my niece?

_You are not going to spill hot soup on me are you?_

_**Don't forget the hot chocolate.**_

You are not helping Al.

No, but we have to go before your father finds a better reason to sue Ron.

_Oh I am pretty sure my dad would have sued Ron for pushing me down the stairs. But me being the nice person I am will forgive him._

_**"Guys we have to go."**_

_Mom! Why are you writing on the list?_

Yeah why didn't you just talk to us?

_**"I did. You did not even notice my presence."**_

_Can we get out of here before Ron puts me in the hospital?_

_**"Why are you calling him Ron?"**_

_It gets to confusing calling him Mr. Weasley. _

**Nobody knows which Uncle he is talking about.**

Come on lets go.

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Ginny and Harry are only going to be in this chapter I think. I might put them in the next chapter. It depends on wether or not I want Scorpius at Hogwarts.

Review!


	14. Albus Potter and France

**Sorry for the late update. **

**Hugo's handwriting is going to be bold.**

_**"Betty's handwriting is going to be this."**_

_

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_

_**Slight burn? Ha your whole body that had the soup spilled on you was bright red. It still hasn't healed all the way.**_

_I was just telling the list that I was fine, but go ahead tell them the truth._

Telling the truth is way better then lying.

_Oh shut it Lily, if Scorpius wants to lie then he can._

And when you end up in hell do not come crying to me.

_Oh come on I am way to hot for hell, right ladies?_

What ladies are you talking to? I am the only girl here.

**Hey guys, have you seen Minnie yet? Her hair is bright green with sliver high lights.**

_**Really, this is something I have got to see. Be back later!**_

**And that is how you get rid of Albus Severus Potter.**

_How come we wanted to get rid of him?_

_I could name a few reasons. First: He is annoying._

_He barely wrote on the list at all._

**Second Reason: He has bad body odor. Seriously when was the last time he took a shower?**

_I have to agree on you with that._

Third reason: He is not really fun to hang out with.

**I know, just the other day I asked him if he would like play chess with me and he turned me down to study. STUDY!**

_Wow I am shocked. Albus never studies._

_I know! Usually he blackmails me with my crush on Rose to do his homework. Oops, did I write that on paper?_

_Yep. _

_James I do not like that smile._

_What smile?_

_The smile that means 'You are so going to get blackmailed into doing something stupid and embarrassing yet extremely funny' you are wearing it right now._

Scorpius how was your holidays? Do you have something for your list?

_Yes I have something for my list and my holidays were…enjoyable._

_Except the fact that he got hot soup and hot chocolate poured all over him._

Before you ask Uncle Ron poured it on him.

_It was Al's fault! He is the idiot who told Uncle Ron that he should be nicer to me because one day I will be his son in law. He did not stop picking on me until we left. He pushed my down a flight of stairs you know._

Ron Weasley did that?

**Yes my father did. I am so ashamed.**

Really?

**No.**

Well I must be going.

_Bye Minnie!_

_Great she is gone!_

Thank you for pointing out the obvious.

_It is my honor._

Idiot.

_Do you think Rose likes me?_

**How many times do we have to go over this? I write spell it slowly.**

**SHE…HATES…YOUR…GUTS!**

_Thanks Hugo but that was not what I meant. _

I think she might somewhere in her heart of hers like you.

_As a friend of course, you are not that lucky._

_Thanks guys. That makes me feel really happy._

_We try are best._

Oh no.

_What?_

Betty is coming.

_**"Hey Scorpy! So I figured out where are wedding is going to be."**_

_Really, where?_

_**"It is going to be in France."**_

**Why France?**

_**"Because France is the love area."**_

_Really?_

_No, at least I do not think so._

_**"Once we have are wedding is in France it will be the love area."**_

_You are really starting to freak me out Betty._

_**"See you later Scorpy bear."**_

_Guys stop laughing._

She called you Scorpy bear.

_I know. Stop the laughing right now or I will…_

_You will what Scorpy bear?_

_I am going to kill you James!_

Wait for me!

_**What were you talking about Hugo? Minnie's hair was not green with sliver highlights.**_

_**Guys?**_

_**Anyone here?**_

* * *

Hope you like it! Review!

_For those of you wondering I am completely healed. I just had a slight burn from the soup._


	15. Al Potter again and James' girlfriend

**Sorry for the late update! My computer crashed. Sorry for the short chapter! The next one will be longer!

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**

I am mad!

_Why is that Rose?_

**I got my first detention ever!**

_In all 5 years at Hogwarts you get your first detention now?_

**Yes. My father said he would disown me if I got one detention and I was trying to get through Hogwarts without getting a detention.**

_Didn't your father get a detention in like his first year?_

**Probably.**

_Then he really should not disown you for getting a detention. Now that I think of it Hugo would have been disowned already. He has had about 10-20 detentions already._

**He has hasn't he? I am going to write my mother on this. Thanks Scorpius.**

_You are welcome._

_Yes!!!!!!!!_

_Why are you grinning like an idiot?_

_Read above._

_Whoa!!!! You actually had a conversation with Rose without fighting?_

_Yes._

_That bumps you up from being an enemy to being a friend._

_I know! That is why I am grinning._

_**To bad either you or Rose is going to screw it up and are going to be back to being enemys.**_

_Shut up Al! Where are Lily and Hugo?_

_**They are in class idiot.**_

_I new that!_

_**Sure you did.**_

_I wish Lily wasn't in class. I want to tell her how Rose actually talked to me._

…

_,,,_

_That sounded gay didn't it?_

_**Really gay, so anyway James how is your relationship with Alice coming along?**_

_Great! I honestly think she is the one!_

_Really?_

_Yes!_

_**Then why is she flirting with Michael Brown?**_

_She is what?!!!!_

_Shut up Al! She is not Flirting with Brown._

_**Always ruins my fun.**_

_Suck it up Al._

_Guys I was serious I really think she is the one._

_Al he said serious without making the stupid joke. _

_**I know, I am really, really worried.**_

_I think he is actually being serious._

_**Yep another reason why it scares me, James is never serious.**_

_I am still here you know._

_We know._

_**We just don't care.**_

_I being the nice guy I am Al will forgive you for saying that._

_Sometimes I like being an only child. Actually I take that back I wish I had a younger sibling. It gets so quite at home._

**Hey James, Alice is looking for you.**

_Why is she looking for me?_

**Something about and I quote 'I think James is cheating on me.' She also said 'He is probably cheating on me with Scorpius. Why are all the hot guys gay? I better ask him.'**

_She thinks I am gay!!!!_

**Yes.**

_HAHAHA James! Your girlfriend thinks you are gay…wait she said you were probably cheating on me. That would mean she thinks I am gay too!!!! I will not stand for this! Come on James we are going to set your girlfriend straight!!!_

**Does Scorpius really just leave his list places?**

_**Yes. **_

**He must really trust you guys.**

_**He does. Why are you writing on this list anyway? I thought you hated Scorpius.**_

**I do hate him!**

_**Then why are you blushing?**_

**I am not!**

_**Yes you are. You like him don't you?**_

_**Ouch!!!!!! That hurt Rose! All I asked was if you liked him it does not give you the right to kick me in my little spot. I mean huge spot.**_

**Yes it does! And if this wasn't a list be checked by a teacher I would totally swear at you! I am leaving.**

_**She seemed to overreacted to much to the question I asked. Who here bets she likes him? No one is here. I am sad.**_

Poor Al. Hope you like it! Review!


	16. Snakes and Therapy

**Hugo is in bold! I do not own anything!**_

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___

Hi everyone! I have got to write down something I hate or Minnie is going to kill me. So I am just going to say what I hate. I hate…snakes.

_You do? That is kind of weird. Isn't your house animal a snake?_

_Yep._

Why do you hate snakes?

_When I was 9 I fell into a pit full of very deadly snakes. It was horrifying._

**Where were you that you fell into a pit?**

_Africa._

_Why were you in Africa?_

_Family vacation._

_**Really and where were your parents?**_

_Inside the house we were staying at. Why are you asking questions?_

_**No reason.**_

_Sure…James why are you staring at me?_

_I was just wondering how someone can have that large of a pimple._

_What! I have a pimple? Where?_

_Haha made you look._

_Not funny._

_**It kind of was.**_

_Shut up if you know what is good for you._

_**I know what is good for me. Do you know what is good for you?**_

_Do you want to fight me?_

_**Yeah I do punk. Bring it!**_

_Fine!_

Are they really fighting?

**Yes Lily they are.**

_Fight, Fight, Fight!_

_**You know what Scorpius I am going somewhere I am appreciated.**_

_Where is that Norway? _

_**I am going to study with Rose!**_

_Good riddance!_

_You two are so entertaining when you fight._

**Entertaining in a good way.**

_I am so bored._

_Hey it could be worse._

_How?_

_Alice could still think we were gay and madly in love._

_Don't remind me. What made her even think that?_

_I do not know we do seem to hang out a lot._

_Maybe we should stop hanging out._

Maybe you two should shut up.

I agree with Miss Potter. Now Scorpius how is your life coming along?

_Just perfect, my parents bought me a new broom. I found a family photo album. I now think Narcissa's mother cheated on her husband with Lucius's father. For how else does everyone else in the family have black hair and her have blond? And lastly I found out that most of my family in my family tree inbreeded with a cousin._

Yes and how do you feel about that?

_What do you mean how do I feel about that? Why can't you people just leave me alone!_

Yes and that makes you feel?

_We just went over this! I don't feel a thing except slightly disgusted that my grandparents might be half brother and sister oh and defiantly disgusted that most of my family inbreeded. _

Yes well my time is up.

**Well that was weird.**

You are telling me.

_Does most of your family really inbreed Scorpius?_

_Apparently, your father might of inbreeded too._

_What do you mean?_

_If all Potter men are attracted to red hair well the Weasley's hair is hard not to miss._

_Remind me to never look up are family tree._

**At least I know my father did not inbreed.**

How do you know? Aunt Hermione could have been lying about her past and be a distance cousin of Ron.

**But the odds of that are like -0.**

_Yeah and I am pretty sure Hermione's parents would know that she was there daughter. They have a video giving birth to her._

Really?

_Yeah._

**How do you know that?**

_Know what?_

_How do you know about the video?_

_What video? What are you guys talking about?_

**You just said the video and my mom's parents and everything.**

_Are you sure you are not insane Hugo?_

**I hate you.**

_I know._

Hey guys can we leave for lunch now? I am hungry.

_So am I. To the Great Hall! _

Hope you like it! Review!


	17. Lord Voldemort or Tommy and Chainsaws

I do not own anything!

**Hugo is bold!**

_

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_

_Okay it seems that Albus is too cool to hang out with us. So he is off studying with Rose. I feel so alone!_

_Do not feel alone you have us._

_Yeah you have the awesome Potters with you not the lame Potter. _

_You guys are not making me feel better. How could Al give up are friendship for her. That evil little witch!_

**_Scorpius cut the stupid act. We all know that you are dying to be in Albus shoes right now._**

_I am not!_

**_Yes you are. You would give anything to be studying with Rose._**

_I would not give anything_

_Yes you would._

_Alright I would._

_Okay now that you admitted it what are we going to do?_

_You could leave Scorpius alone so he can actually write about his feelings on this list._

_We could but that would be boring._

**_Hey James aren't you suppose to be with Alice?_**

_Probably but she is all moody. I think it is her time of the month._

**_She is going to turn into a werewolf tonight?_**

_Okay Hugo first off the full moon was two weeks ago. He means the other time of month._

**_What is the other time of month?_**

_You know when girls go through puberty._

**_What happens when they go through puberty?_**

_Did your parents tell you anything?_

_I am going to leave before this conversation gets out of hand._

_Apparently they didn't._

_I guess that means we can't tell him either._

**_Guys just tell me what the girls time of month is._**

_Does anyone else get a déjà vu feeling? I feel like we had this conversation already._

_Yeah I have that feeling too._

_We probably did. Oh well._

_Okay I hate Voldemort or Tommy what ever you like to call him._

**_We already new that. Why are you writing that?_**

_I just wrote down what I hate so we could talk about it and then I am clear for today on what I hate._

_Now that you mention it I hate Tommy too._

**_Me too._**

_I don't._

_Gasp! How could you not hate him?_

_I dislike him. He probably only turned evil because he caught the love of his life cheating on him._

_What are the odds of that._

**_Yeah my dad said Tommy wasn't able to love._**

_I am just saying. Even evil people have that special someone._

_Yes but this is Tommy we are talking about. He looked like a snake._

**_I know. All he needed was to cut his tough to look like a snake and he would looked exactly like one._**

_I wonder what Albus is doing._

_I could really care less about Al. If he wants to study with Rose then he can._

_Why did you change the conversation James?_

_Cause I do not like talking about Tommy._

**_Guys I am going to bed. I have to get up early for a date._**

_Goodnight Hugo!_

_I should probably go to bed too. Goodnight guys._

_Isn't it nice? It is all quiet._

_James what are you doing?_

_Is that a chainsaw?_

_Why are you slowly walking towards me with the chainsaw?_

_JAMES! _

_I do not own anything! Review!_


	18. Ron Weasley 2 and Chocolate

**Okay so I decided to change how the handwriting was because I got confused while writing it.**

**SM: Is Scorpoius Malfoy.**

**LP: Is Lily.**

**JP: Is James.**

**HW: Is Hugo.**

**AP: Is Albus.**

**I do not own anything!**:

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**SM: **Hello list! I am okay. Actually that is a lie. I am a little freaked out and a little amused. The other day James came at me with a chainsaw. Don't worry I am perfectly fine. James is in a detention. Apparently you are not allowed to have chainsaws at school or are you allowed to slowly approach a fellow student as if you were going to kill them. Who new?

**LP: **I knew! Oh and if you get a letter from James apologizing for acting like he was going to kill you my mom told him to do that.

**HW: **My dad mailed me a letter to me telling me to tell James that if he killed Scorpius he would help it look like suicide.

**SM: **Your father hates me that much?

**HW: **Pretty much. After I finish reading that letter my mom mailed me a letter telling me not to listen to my father and that if James did kill you he would be in Azkaban.

**LP:** Hugo, are you sure your father is not some serial killer?

**SM: **He is probably not a serial killer. Just wait till my father and him become in-laws.

**HW: **I dream of that day.

**LP: **You dream of the day your sister gets married to Scorpius?

**HW: **No I dream of the day my father finds out that Scorpius and Rose are engaged. Hey Scorpius, are you going to ask my father for permission to ask Rose to marry you?

**SM:** NO!!!!! Don't you remember what he did to me because I had to come over to your house over the holiday?

**HW: **How could anyone forget? It was so funny!

**LP: **It was not funny! How could Uncle Ron do that? He must have ate something off that day.

**HW: **No he actually planned it.

**SM: **What do you mean he planned it?!

**HW: **Once he found out that you were coming over for the holidays he locked himself in his study and started planning ways to get you to lose all connection to the Weasleys and the Potters.

**SM: **He doesn't even know me!

**HW: **He knows how your father was during school and that is good enough for him.

**SM: **But my father has changed from them! And I am not like my father was at school! I might be a Slytherin but the hat wanted to put me in Gryffindor.

**LP:** If the hat wanted to put you in Gryffindor then why did you choose Slytherin?

**SM: **I love the color green! And besides red looks horrible on me while green makes me look hot! Sexy! Beautiful!

**JP: **Keep telling yourself that Scorpius.

**SM: **AH! James! You are not going to come after me with a chainsaw are you?

**JP: **What chainsaw?

**HW: **Don't you remember James? You went after Scorpius with a chainsaw yesterday.

**JP: **I did no such thing!

**SM: **Then tell us James what did you do yesterday night if you didn't come after me with a chainsaw?

**JP: **I don't remember. I think I was writing on this parchment and everyone else went to bed and it was just you and me. Then my mind went blank.

**LP: **Oh I know what happened. James did you eat any of the candy I gave you yesterday?

**HW: **Oh now I know where you are going Lily.

**JP: **I had some.

**LP: **Can you show me the bag?

**JP: **Yeah sure.

**LP: **James this bag is empty. You said you had a few.

**JP:** I did. You never asked me if I had a few in your count or if I had a few in my count.

**SM: **So eating a whole bag of chocolate is a few pieces to you?

**JP: **Yes.

**SM: **How come you are not fat?

**JP: **It is called exercise.

**HW: **All Weasley and Potter boys can eat as much as they want and never get fat. It is in are genes.

**JP: **Hugo! How dare you let off are little secret!

**SM: **My family is like that too. Weird.

**LP: **A lot of wizard families are like that.

**JP: **Is anyone hungry?

**SM: **Now that you mention that I am kind of hungry.

**AP: **Hey guys!

**SM: **Oh so now we are cool enough to hang out with.

**AP: **I have something really important to tell you!

**JP: **Well you are going to have to tell him later. We are going to get a snack.

**LP: **Yeah by Al.

**AP: **But it is really important.

**SM: **Whatever Al. We might talk to you when you are cool enough to hand out with.

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Hope you like it! Review!


	19. Books and Albus Potter

I do not own anything! **

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****AP:**Scorpius you really would want to know what I am going to tell you!

**JP: **Did you read anything Scorpius?

**SM: **Nope I didn't. Did you read anything Lily and Hugo?

**LP: **Nope.

**HW: **Nada.

**AP: **It is really important!

**JP: **So Scorpius what are you doing over the summer?

**SM: **I don't know. I probably will fly on my broom, read, listen to my grandfather rant about how Purebloods are superior, read some more, listen to my parents and grandmother telling me that anything my grandfather tells me is a lie, start a new book to read, do the over summer homework, read another book, have another talk from my grandfather, read another book, listen to my parents again, and finally finish the whole library at my house again.

**LP: **How many books are in your library?

**SM: **My family has enough books to own a huge library and still not have enough room to put all the books.

**HW: **How many times have you read the all of your books?

**SM: **About….13 times.

**AP: **It is about Ro—

**JP: **How can you read all those books? And if you have so many how do you read them all 13 times?!

**SM: **Well I can read about 5 to 8 books a day depending on the length. If the book is about 500 or so pages I can read it in an hour. Give or take a few. If it is longer then that it takes me about two hours. Most of the books at my house are around 400-1500 pages. Give or take a hundred. About half of them are about dark arts. Most of them are just old school books and some are wizard children books. My house has no Muggle books though. I think my grandfather burns them if he finds any. I also really like the Percy Jackson and the Olympians series. Just don't tell my parents or grandparents. They do not know that I have read them. It is a Muggle book.

**LP: **If your parents don't know that you have those books then where di you get them?

**AP: **Scorpius, Rose li—

**SM: **You know that Muggleborn I dated last year?

**HW**: Yeah.

**SM: **Well she really liked this series and she liked the Twilight series too but every time I asked her if I could read it she would yell at me and say Edward was her true love. Does anyone know who Edward is?

**LP: **Edward is a vampire in that series. I hate those books.

**JP: **How can you hate them? Jacob Black is awesome!

**HW: **You are only saying that because you think that Jacob Black is the love child of Sirius Black and Remus Lupin. May I remind you Jacob is fictional!

**JP: **Oh he is real.

**SM: **Is anyone else freaked out by James? I mean he just said that Jacob was real and had this dreamy look on his face. You know what I do not think I am ever going to read the series.

**LP: **Good choice. They are not that good.

**JP: **What are you talking about Lily? They are the best books ever!

**JP: **I mean yeah Lily they are horrible books I can not see why girls like it.

**AP: **Scorpius you know how you like Rose? Well she li—

**HW: **Yeah sure James.

**SM: **Does anyone know what time it is?

**LP: **Yeah it is 2:30.

**SM: **Don't you and Hugo have class now?

**HW: **Probably but we can just say we weren't feeling well.

**AP: **R-O-S-E W-E-A-S-L-E-Y L-I-K—

**JP: **Does anyone get the feeling that what Albus was going to tell us was really important?

**SM: **Yeah I have that feeling too. Where did Albus go?

**LP: **I am not sure. I think he went back to study with Rose.

**AP: **I am right her—

**JP: **Yes he probably went to study with Rose. I wonder why he keeps hanging out with her.

**SM: **Albus hangs out with Rose because she actually will do his homework for him because he is to stupid to know how to do it himself.

**AP: **Hey! I am offended. Do you guys always talk about me behind my back when I am not around?

**SM: **Albus! We thought you went back to hand out with Rose.

**AP: **I have been here the whole time! Oh and James are you sure you are not gay?

**JP: **I AM NOT GAY! So I like a character in a book series that happens to be a guy. That does not make me gay!

**LP: **Keep telling yourself that.

**SM: **Anyway Al. What was that important thing you wanted to tell us?

**AP: **You know now I do not think I should tell you. I am too stupid to know how to tell you it anyway.

**SM: **Oh come on Al you know I do not mean it like that.

**AP: **Fine I will tell you. You know how I went to study with Rose earlier today? Well when I got there after lunch there was this piece of paper hanging out of her bag. It looked like a love letter so I being the over protective cousin I am went to see who it was from. Well it happened to be her hate list. By the way did you guys know she hates roses? I mean who in the world like green heathers? They don't even exist. Some dude gave her green heathers for Valentines Day. The dude did not give her a card with it. What if it was a girl? Scorpius, are you blushing? Oh you gave her the flowers. You know that is—

**JP: **Just get to the point.

**AP: **Sorry anyway Rose likes you.

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I haven't actually read the Twilight books but my sister thinks they are boring and my friends think they are awesome so I put in a little debate in here.

The last chapter will be posted either later today or tomorrow.

Hope you like it! Review!


	20. Finally Together and Annoying Betty

I do not own anything!**

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****JP: **That is a cruel joke Albus. I am ashamed that you are my brother.

**AP: **I am not joking! It was on her list she really likes you!

**JP: **We all know she likes me but it is cruel to say she likes Scorpius.

**AP: **Shut up James! Scorpius Rose likes you! She wrote it down on her list! I am serious!

**SM: **Please stop with the joke Albus.

**LP: **Yeah Albus. You know Scorpius loves Rose and it is plain cruel to tell him that Rose likes him when we know she doesn't.

**AP:** I am serious! Fine if you don't believe me then I will prove it! Come on Scorpius.

**HW: **Is Albus really dragging Scorpius out of the library?

**LP: **Albus must have been serious.

**JP: **Come on guys we all know that I am the serious one. It is in my name.

**HW: **Shut up James! That joke got old before Sirius Black even started it.

**BP: **Have you seen Scorpius? I wanted to tell him that my parents are trying to arrange our marriage with his parents! They think they are close to getting Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy to agree.

**JP: **Get out of here Betty!

**LP: **And news flash Betty Scorpius and Rose are confessing that they are in love with each other right as we speak!

**BP: **What! This is not possible! Scorpius loves me! I am going to kill that bi—

**HW: **James what did you do to her?

**JP: **All I did was accidentally hit her on the head with a humongous potion text book. How was I supposed to know it would knock her out?

**HW: **Is it bad for me to hope that she is dead?

**LP: **Hugo Weasley! What would your father say?!

**HW: **Good riddance to those nasty Slytherins.

**LP: **Let me rephrase that. What would your mother say?!

**HW: **She would tell me never to think like that and she would ground me for a week.

**JP: **Man my father would just tell me this 'James you know it is wrong to wish people dead. You may dislike a person but never wish death upon them.'

**HW: **Does he actually expect you to listen to that advice? Didn't your dad ever wish someone dead?

**LP: **Yes he did. Draco Malfoy. But then when he almost did die, by Harry's hands of course, he changed his view.

**HW: **When was this?

**JP: **His sixth year.

**HW: **Oh.

**LP: **I wonder what is taking Al and Scorpius so long.

**BP: **Where is that tram—

**JP: **You have got to love humongous text books.

**HW: **Even when you can't think that Betty can get even more annoying she does.

**LP: **I know. Don't you guys think Betty is a little Hypocritical? I mean she hates anyone who even looks at Scorpius yet she throws herself at every guy at Hogwarts who is third year and up.

**JP: **She never threw herself at me.

**HW: **Do you want her to throw herself at you?

**JP: **NO!

**LP: **Then why are you asking?

**JP: **It helps boost my confidence.

**AP: **ROSE AND SCORPIUS ARE TOGETHER!

**JP: **Really?

**AP: **Yes!

**LP: **I will take the 'I just got kissed by the girl of my dreams' look as a yes they got together.

**SM: **ROSE WEASLEY LIKES ME! She actually likes me!

**JP: **Yes and now that this is all settled we have to kill you.

**SM: **What!

**RW: **You will do no such thing James Sirius Potter!

**SM: **Hi Rose.

**LP: **Hello Rose! You are late though.

**RW: **What do you mean I am late?

**LP:** I bet that you would get together a week ago. You just let James win the stupid bet! You are so not getting a birthday present.

**RW: **You betted on when Scorpius and I would get together?!

**HW: **Yeah. About the whole school including some teachers put some money in. It just sucks that James gets it all.

**RW: **Who started this bet?

**LP: **James.

**RW: **JAMES!

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I am so sad that this story is over. :'(

Anyway I wanted to know if you guys think I should make a James Potter hate list. I have a poll up on my profile.

Review!


	21. Author's Note

Authors Note:

I have started James Potter's List.

That is all.


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